


Nothing Works

by LjGreen24



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Crying, Eating Disorders, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Insecurity, Triggers, body image issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:00:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26266876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LjGreen24/pseuds/LjGreen24
Summary: Huening Kai stared at himself in the mirror, hating everything that he saw.Nothing was working.
Relationships: Choi Soobin & Huening Kai
Comments: 1
Kudos: 25





	Nothing Works

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a fan-fiction idea that popped into my head, nothing about this is based off of real life events

Huening Kai stared at himself in the mirror, hating everything that he saw. 

Nothing was working.

He had tried dieting, exercising, cutting his meals in half and giving the rest away to the others, but nothing was working, and he hated himself for it.

His body was mocking him, making him feel like complete shit.

He started declining food when it was offered, making the excuse that he’d eaten earlier.

They had a comeback coming up, so it was easy to slip under the radar. Yes, he would go out to eat with the others when they went out to eat, eating as little as he could get away with in order to avoid suspicion.

And then he would go home and throw up what he could.

It would destroy him, but he wouldn’t admit that.

He felt slightly weak during their performances, but he always forced himself to remain perky and enthusiastic.

No one would notice.

………………………………………………………………..

Three weeks later, he couldn’t believe no-one had noticed.

His stomach had shrunk back to the point where his ribs could be seen poking through. His legs felt weak, arms barely able to pull his shirt off.

He still felt fat though.

……………………………………………………………….

“Huening Kai… what’s going on?”

Huening Kai startled out of his thoughts, glancing over at Soobin, before shrugging. “Nothing.”

Soobin sighed wearily, switching off the music he’d been listening to. “That’s bullshit, and you know it. You’ve been skipping meals, and don’t lie and say that you haven’t, because you have.”

“I ate yesterday!” Huening Kai immediately protested, acting as though Soobin was completely over-reacting.

“Barely!” Soobin snapped, before taking a deep breath, “Look… I’m worried about you, okay? What’s going on?” 

“I’m fine!” 

“Stop it! You’re not!”

Huening Kai was silent for a moment, before quietly speaking up again, “I know what I’m doing.”

“No, you don’t!” Soobin’s voice was louder than he intended, as evident by the way he flinched when he thought he heard a door creaking from further in the dorms. “You have no clue what you’re doing, because if you did, you wouldn’t be doing it.” He hissed, “You need to eat or you’re going to die and none of us want that! Don’t you know how upset we would be?!” 

Silence.

“Why did you think this was necessary? Why this was the right way to go?”

“I-I- “ Huening Kai fought not to cry, “- I’ve tried dieting. I’ve tried exercising, I’ve tried cutting back on the amount I eat but nothing is working! I’m fat and disgusting like all those people keep saying, and even though I’m losing weight, I still feel- “Huening Kai quickly cut himself off, full blown panic taking over, making him want to just run and never stop.

“… You still feel what?”

“… Like I don’t matter. I feel like I don’t matter.”

Soobin’s face softened visibly, “Don’t say that.” He whispered, “You are worth so much to us and numerous other people.” He reached over and gently squeezed Huening Kai’s arm, trying to communicate how much he cared through his gaze.

“I can’t live with my body.” Huening Kai started to sob, “I look fucking gross constantly, I can barely keep up on stage and I don’t sound as good as you guys and- “

“- What are you talking about?!” Soobin interjected, not letting go of Huening’s Kai arm, “You never look gross, you always look amazing!”

Seeing that the younger teen didn’t believe him, Soobin pulled him into a hug.

He knew this wouldn’t be an easy fix, but he was willing to be there every step of the way. No matter way.

“You are everything to us.” He whispered, “A fantastic dancer, singer and person… I don’t care how long it’ll take for you to know this, but I’ll be here.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”


End file.
